So, So Close

How close was I was to passing the July 2012 California Bar Exam?

"Your answers were all read twice, your averaged total scaled score was below 1440, and at least one of your answers had a discrepancy greater than 10 raw points between the first and second read grades assigned.  Any answer with a significant discrepancy was referred to a member of the Examination Development and Grading Team for a third reading in order to resolve the discrepancy."

They had to grade one of my performance tests three times.  That's how close I was.  The third grader decided to give me a 55, despite the fact that the second grader had given me a 70.  (62.5 is considered a passing score.)  When you receive your score, you are given the formulas for scaled scoring.  Playing with the numbers, I learned that if I had received a 63 or higher on that one PT instead of a 55, I would have passed the exam.

That's how close I was to passing.  Three graders quibbling over one question.

And so, I find myself enrolled in yet another bar review course, preparing for my fourth time taking the exam.

I'll be honest with you: it is very tempting to feel discouraged and cheated by this news.  I thought I was impossibly close to passing last time, but that was nothing compared with the prodigious frustration of knowing that one grader gave you more points than you needed to pass, only to have that score dismissed by a subsequent grader.

And yet, I must keep things in perspective.  If the absolute worst thing going on in my life is that I came very close to passing the most difficult exam of my career, then I've got a pretty good life.  I am seven months into an incredible job where I get paid to end homelessness.  I just moved into my very own apartment in San Francisco, one of the most charming and fascinating cities on this planet.  I have a fluffy cat who is equal parts adorable and mischievous.  I have an incredibly loving and supportive family, and am surrounded by friends who provide me with laughter, encouragement, and baked goods.

So, yes, I am taking the bar exam for the fourth time.  A year ago, I would have been humiliated to share that information with anyone, fearful of judgment.  But, I've grown a lot since then, and I've learned that my friends, family, and colleagues value me based on my character, not on my score.  Thank you all so much for supporting me throughout these past three attempts.

February 26-28, here we come.

Riding the Rails

Feeling nostalgic on my last day commuting from Sunnyvale before I move to SF. My daily commute has been extreme: a two-mile bike ride to the Sunnyvale Caltrain station, then a train ride from Sunnyvale to San Francisco that can take anywhere from 45 to 76 minutes (assuming no delays), and then a mile-long walk to work. All told, I have been spending 3.5 to 4 hours per day commuting.

In the past six months, I have traveled 9,801 miles by train, 484 miles by bike, and 242 miles by foot.

But, it hasn't been all bad. I have loved having a bike ride built into my day. The train is perfect for reading, and way more relaxing than driving to SF. I enjoy that I've become a regular at the Bean Scene, my favorite cafe in downtown Sunnyvale.

All the same, I am looking forward to my new roundtrip commute of 0.4 miles!

Apartment FTW!

I finally found an apartment in San Francisco!

For over two months, I have been compulsively checking Craigslist for new apartment postings.  I even had an RSS feed in Google Reader.  As I learned after my first couple of weeks of hunting, you have to respond extremely quickly to get a place.  If you don't show up to the open house with all of your paperwork filled out, you don't stand a chance.

Nine weeks and 30 apartments later, I had truly honed my apartment hunting skills.  Open houses are for fools, having to compete with so many other people.  So, when I saw a posting on Wednesday for an open house at 10 am on Thursday for a cute little studio with bay windows and hardwood floors two blocks from work, I immediately emailed the broker--Pam the Rental Gal--to see if we could schedule something for 9:30.  She was available!  I got her to send me a copy of the application form, and filled it out completely, putting together a packet with a cover letter, the application form, some supplemental applicant information, my resume, and my most recent pay stub.  I didn't include my credit report because they wanted to run the report themselves.

I met Pam Thursday morning, walking those two gloriously short blocks from work at Powell and Market to the apartment on Mason at Eddy.  The building is tall and narrow--eight floors, but only four units per floor.  The neighborhood is full of hotels, hostels, restaurants, shopping, and tourists, because it's so close to the cable cars and Union Square.  I felt perfectly safe walking there, which is more than I can say for some of the apartments I viewed in the Tenderloin, or even lower Nob Hill.

Pam and I took the elevator up to the fifth floor to check out the apartment.  Here are the photos from the Craigslist ad to give you an idea of what I saw.  This is the main space of the studio, with those gorgeous bay windows for which I hadn't been daring to hope:

Here's the other side of the room, looking at the big closet:

You can see the hallway and the front door, and those black stripes are in the tiny, tiny kitchen:

There are about six inches of counter space next to the sink.  I'm going to have to put in some sort of pantry organizer rack so I have somewhere to store food, a microwave and a toaster, I think.  You might be wondering, where's the fridge?  Well, they creatively installed it in the hallway, with the back of the fridge capitalizing on a bit of dead space in the far right corner of the closet:

The bathroom is through that door to the left:

So, after inspecting the apartment, I turned in my application to Pam, who quite literally squealed in delight at how organized I was.  She told me that she was doing the open house at 10, but assuming that my credit and eviction reports looked good, she'd give me a call that afternoon to offer me the place!

It was very difficult to focus on work on Thursday, waiting for Pam to call.  But, call she did, offering me the apartment, and telling me that I was lucky that I turned in my application first, because two other people handed in applications at the open house.  My cunning strategy had paid off!  I signed the lease electronically that afternoon, turned in a cashier's check Friday morning, and by 10:30 am on Friday had the key to my new apartment in hand.

It was a rather whirlwind experience, to search for an apartment for so long, preparing myself to make so many compromises on location and features, only to get an apartment fewer than 48 hours after first seeing the post on Craigslist.  Now, I'm packing, and plan to hire my brother and one of his friends to help me move next weekend.  I'm so glad to get Veterans Day off to start setting things up!  I need a number of things for my apartment, but I'm not going to rush to buy them all at once.  Rather, I'm going to take some time to start living in that space, and think creatively about the best ways to take advantage of my small space.  For instance, my biggest debate right now is whether I want to loft my full-size bed to free up more floor space.

I am so excited for this new chapter in my life.  As much as starting my new job has been a major turning point, I think that finding this apartment signifies officially becoming an independent adult.  It is a wonderful feeling, and I am definitely counting my blessings.

Let's Catch Up

Hey gang, I've been on a blogging hiatus for a while!  So many things have happened in the past four months:

I became a full-time, permanent staff lawyer at HomeBase.

I took the CA bar exam, and it felt good.  (Results coming in mid-November.)

I went to Yosemite for Siobhan & Sean's beautiful wedding.

I went to St. Paul for work, and went to the Minnesota State Fair with Molly.

I saw Jim Gaffigan do stand-up at the Mountain Winery for my birthday.

I went to Lake Tahoe to celebrate Morgan's birthday.

I began my San Francisco apartment hunt, which is ongoing.

I went to Seattle to visit Jaki and David (and ran into Saleema).

I went to the Big Game with my dad, and we had fun even though Cal lost.

I could spend an entire post on any of these events, but I think this will have to do.  I'm hoping to be more frequent in my posts in the future!

Phoenix

Last week, I took my first business trip.  I was a last-minute add to the trip.  I was working with two colleagues to prepare for some meetings in Phoenix, and they said, "You know, it would be easier if you would just come with us...  Let's look up some flights!"  And so, I found myself in Phoenix on Tuesday and Wednesday last week.

The intensity of the hot weather in Phoenix cannot be overstated.  It was 108° when I was in town, which is extreme.  As I exited the airport for the first time, I was shocked to learn that even one's eyeballs can feel hot.  And yet, it was freezing in all of the buildings with air conditioners blasting, so my Bay Area instinct to dress in layers nonetheless proved useful.

We stayed at the Hotel Valley Ho, which is a historic hotel in Scottsdale.  The architecture was designed by a student of Frank Lloyd Wright, and it has an awesome "Jetsons-in-the-desert" feel--that very 1950s concept of the future, mixed with Arizonan elements.

Our meetings went well.  Having spent a lot of time preparing the materials for the meetings, it was great to see our work in action, and meet a lot of our clients.  I should be heading back to Phoenix in early August for another set of meetings--hopefully I'll be able to spend a little more time there and explore the city.

Settling In

I've been at HomeBase for six weeks now, and it's been awesome.  Having been an intern, it was easy for me to jump right into the work and start taking on responsibility.  It's a bit frustrating to have to study for the bar exam while gearing up in my new job, because I'd love to be able to pour 100% of my energy into work.  But, in another six weeks, the bar exam will be over, and things will really start to fall into place.

The nature of my work is very fast-paced and eclectic, which I love.  In a single day, I might research pending legislation, draft a grant proposal, write a memo on some best practices, or facilitate a meeting with clients to brainstorm how to improve their system.

While most of our work is in the Bay Area, we also have some national technical assistance work for HUD, which takes us all over the country.  Indeed, I will be going to Phoenix for a couple of days next week for some meetings. I am excited by how quickly I've begun to feel like a valuable team member with things to contribute.

Last week, I gave a presentation at our regional steering committee on Medicaid expansion under the Affordable Care Act.  It felt a bit like a "fake it 'til you make it" moment, because I'm by no means an expert on heath care reform, but I think it went well.  I, like most folks in the policy world, am awaiting the Supreme Court's opinion on the ACA with baited breath.  My hope is that they'll leave the entire law in effect, but my prediction is that they'll sever the individual mandate.

Today was lovely, because it was the annual intern hike, which is like our version of a company picnic.  We all carpooled out to the Marin Headlands for some hiking, followed by a BBQ picnic near the beach.  What a fantastic way to spend a Wednesday.

Third Time's the Charm

I learned on Friday that I was unsuccessful on the February administration of the California bar exam.  I was on my way home from work when the results came out online, so I spent an hour sitting on the train with my sunglasses on, feebly attempting to hide the fact that I was crying.  When I got home, both of my parents were waiting for me, and enveloped me in a huge, long hug.

We talked for a while, and I admitted to myself and to them how much of an emotional toll this exam has taken on me the past year.  I explained how the pressure to do well, especially the second time, left me feeling paralyzed with fear.  I acknowledged that I really struggled with studying for the exam full-time because of burn-out, worrying excessively, and the lack of human interaction.

I will take the bar exam again July 24-26.  I am feeling confident that I will pass this time for a number of reasons.

1. The pressure to succeed is greatly reduced, because I am employed.  A large part of my trepidation about the exam has been how closely it was linked to my chances of finding work.  Now that I'm employed, the bar exam has less of an impact on my well-being and sense of self-worth.
2. I will not be studying full time.  The fact that I'm working while studying might seem like challenge, but I think it will actually be helpful.  When I had all the time in the world, I wasted hours and hours just worrying.  This summer, I will be too busy to worry.  Having a limited amount of time will cause me to focus on what's crucial.
3. I will be taking a different bar prep course with a visual learning approach.  Barbri has not worked well for me because there is no interactive learning or accountability.  This summer, I will be using the BarPassers tutorial program, which relies on flowcharts, weekly live classes, and a ton of personalized feedback.
4. I came maddeningly close to passing the February exam.  I got my scores in the mail on Saturday, and they made me feel really good.  A passing scaled score on the exam is 1440.  My score was 1417--so close, they had to grade my essays and performance tests twice.  My MBE (multiple choice) raw score, which was the main reason I didn't pass last July, jumped up by 25 questions.  If I had done just a tiny bit better on any section, I would have passed.

The next two months are going to be crazy busy, but worth it.  Although I am still lamenting* not having passed this time around, I'm feeling good about this summer.  I like being busy.  I thrive under the pressure of deadlines.  This is exactly the type of situation I need to get into the zone, that frame of mind where everything happens efficiently and passionately.  This is it.  The time is now, the place is here.  I am ready.

* A word on lamenting.  My discussion group is currently reading Quest for the Living God by Elizabeth A. Johnson.  The most recent chapter that we read discusses the age-old question of why God lets bad things happen.  Johnson presented a number of different theories from different theologians, but one in particular, Metz, stood out to me.  Metz suggests that, rather than explain away the tension between the good of God and the evil of the world by trivializing it or ignoring it, we should embrace the contradiction through remembering and lamenting.  Remembering Christ's death, his solidarity with humanity, stimulates hope for the future.  And, lamenting to God, despite what bad things have happened, also keeps hope alive, while maintaining a certain awe about the mystery of God.  In my current situation, then, lamenting is good because I am in dialogue with God through prayer, even though I know that I am not ready for the explanations that I demand.  Until such a time, I must rely on faith.

Coming Home

This week has been exciting, unexpected, and a bit nostalgic.   On Wednesday, I began a three-month staff lawyer contract position with  HomeBase!  I am extraordinarily fond of HomeBase, as it was the location of my first legal internship.  I interviewed for a position with them back in March (in fact, on the day after the bar exam ended), but they weren't able to hire me at that time.  Then, on Monday, I got an email from my old supervisor asking me if I'd be interested in some contract work.  I said "Absolutely!" and got a call from the executive director on Tuesday night, asking me to come in Wednesday.  So whirlwind!  For now it is a full-time contract position, but there is serious potential for it to turn into a permanent position.

It all happened so quickly, I didn't even have time to let it sink in and become really excited about it.  It's strange, because it doesn't feel like a "new" job; having already worked there for a summer, I mostly just feel nostalgic.  Indeed, reading over my posts from the summer of 2009, I realized that the last time I did Bay to Breakers (which I'm doing next weekend), I was working for HomeBase!  It's all coming full circle.

This changes everything.  I have an income (and can buy stuff).  I have a plausible path to a permanent position, which would enable me to get my own place and reassert my independence.  I can start repaying my student loans.  Most of all, this gives me a huge psychological boost on my bar exam results coming out next week.  Even if I don't pass, knowing I am employed makes me feel a lot better about it.  (And, because HomeBase mostly does policy work, bar admission isn't a requirement to work there.)  My heart is full of joy and thanksgiving.


Sing a new song to the LORD,
for he has done marvelous deeds.
His right hand and holy arm
have won the victory.
The LORD has made his victory known;
has revealed his triumph in the sight of the nations,
He has remembered his mercy and faithfulness
toward the house of Israel.
All the ends of the earth have seen
the victory of our God.


Shout with joy to the LORD, all the earth;
break into song; sing praise.
Sing praise to the LORD with the lyre,
with the lyre and melodious song.
With trumpets and the sound of the horn
shout with joy to the King, the LORD.


Let the sea and what fills it resound,
the world and those who dwell there.
Let the rivers clap their hands,
the mountains shout with them for joy,
Before the LORD who comes,
who comes to govern the earth,
To govern the world with justice
and the peoples with fairness.

- Psalm 98

Doc Review

The past two-and-a-half weeks, I have been commuting up to San Francisco for a contract document review job.  I cannot say much about the litigation, of course, but I will say that it involves the semiconductor industry.  I saw the job posted on Craigslist, welcoming JDs with no prior doc review experience, so I applied within 45 minutes of the job being posted, and a half-hour later received an email with a bunch of forms to fill out for my employment!

Doc review is extraordinarily boring work.  Essentially, I was paid to sit in a room with 30 people and read strangers' email for eight hours a day.  We used doc review software to code each doc we read based on a variety of different categories derived from a subpoena.  Competitive spirit that I have, I made doc review more fun by trying to beat my prior record for number of documents reviewed in a day.  I always felt good when I hit 700 docs, and my personal best was over 800.

A sunrise view of the Bay from Caltrain.

The commute to San Francisco from Sunnyvale is always pretty intense.  I was working from 8:30 am to 5:30 pm, but left my house at 6:30 am and did not return until 7:15 pm.  I rode my bicycle to the Sunnyvale Caltrain station, took Caltrain all the way up to San Francisco, and then transferred to Muni to get to the office, on Montgomery, a block up from Market.  Muni majorly cramped my style by being behind schedule so often that I missed my preferred train home 60% of the time (a terrible track record)!

On the Monday morning before last, my train struck and killed a man, an apparent suicide.  I was sitting in the second car of the train, and I will never forget the sound of the impact.  I was over an hour late to work because we had to wait for the coroner to come and document the incident.  In the days that followed, I replayed that moment a lot in my head when I was on the train.  I read a well-done Mercury News article from 2009 on how the 10 to 20 Caltrain fatalities (mostly suicides) each year affect Caltrain workers psychologically.  It makes me so sad to imagine being in a place mentally where death seems more welcoming than life.  I was heartened to learn that Google responds to suicide-related search terms with information about the National Suicide Prevention Hotline.

Hopefully, I will receive more doc review jobs through this contract employer.  They told us that they will have a lot more work in the coming year, and will be in touch.  In addition, they have a location in Silicon Valley, so perhaps I will get some work closer to home.  And, now that I have some doc review experience, I can start applying for similar work with other companies.  It's not my dream job, of course, but it's a nice way to make some money and stay busy while waiting for bar exam results (next month!) and a full-time job.

Habitat

At the end of the long day, I surveyed myself.  My jeans were covered in sawdust and mud.  My arms boasted a chalky pink-red hue.  My right hand sported several burgeoning blisters.  And, my hair was molded into what could only be described as hard hat hair.  As my appearance confirmed, my first time volunteering with Habitat for Humanity had been quite productive.

On Friday, I went up to Daly City to work on the construction of a four-story building that will provide condominiums for 36 families.  Monica invited me to tag along as her guest to volunteer with JusticeCorps members for César Chávez Day.  It was fitting to spend the day laboring as a construction worker, contemplating workers' rights.  After learning more about how Habitat works, as well as safety protocols, we divided up into smaller groups to accomplish various tasks.

Along with ten other volunteers, Monica and I spent the day nailing up OSB to studs to form interior walls and rough door framing.  I didn't have much knowledge about carpentry, so it was exciting to get a little technical with things like nail schedules and measurements.  And, I had never used a chalk line tool--so cool!  At the beginning of the day, it was taking me a long time to hammer in each nail, but I was much better by the afternoon, swinging my hammer in long, forceful arcs that hit the head almost every time.

I had always wanted to do Habitat, and I was glad to have this opportunity.  While I enjoyed the day, I'm not sure it was my favorite type of volunteering.  Reflecting on the experience, I think I thrive the most through community service where I am actually able to interact with the person receiving the benefit of my labor.  Here, I could see that there were walls where there had been none, but it was not quite the same as seeing the face of a person I had impacted directly.  Perhaps my experience would be different if I did one of the international week-long builds, where I could see the community being affected.  That being said, I think I would do Habitat again, because doing construction felt pretty hardcore, I felt like I learned some practical skills, and the organization has a very good structure.

Cue Rocky Theme Song

Thanks to a very excellent Groupon, my friend Morgan and I signed up for 30 exercise classes for only $20 at a variety of locations throughout the Bay Area.  Last night, we attended our first class, a boxing/self-defense class at Cissero Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, a tiny studio in San Jose.  Having never tried boxing before, I was a bit nervous about keeping up with the class.  But, as it turned out, Morgan and I were the only two students to show up for the class, which was awesome!  We had the undivided attention of the teacher, who goes by the nickname Tarzan, and even received some pointers from Mr. Cissero himself.  We were repeatedly reminded that this was no mere cardio kickboxing or karate class--this was the real deal.  I must admit, and forgive my language, it felt pretty badass.

We spent the first half of the class working on the form of our jab and cross, moving forward and backward across the mat in short spurts.  Once we seemed to have the hang of the punches, we wrapped our hands and put on boxing gloves, and did some one-on-one practice with the teachers, getting used to punching with the gloves on.

The toughest part of the class was the drills.  For a good 20 minutes, we repeated the following 30-second drills: jab-cross, receive jab-cross, jumping jacks, bobbing and weaving, push ups with one arm in an elbow plank, and crunches.  It was exhausting!  We weren't told how long we'd be doing the drills, so it was a serious test of endurance.  I know I wouldn't have had the self-discipline to push myself to complete those drills on my own, which is why it was so great to have a teacher to hold me accountable.

Morgan and I were tired, yet exhilarated, after the class.  Not only was it an awesome workout (both cardio and upper body strength), but also it felt practical, learning some self-defense.  I definitely want to continue with boxing classes, and cannot wait to see my progress!

Post-Bar, the Sequel

It's wonderful to find myself in a post-bar exam world again.  The exam went well enough.  It's impossible to tell how I did, of course, but I found myself feeling very calm in the days leading up to it.  I think it helped that I had no jitters about the unknown, having taken it before.  The three-day exam took place at the Oakland Convention Center, so I stayed at the Washington Inn across the street.  It was nice to have such an easy "commute."  There were no surprises during the exam, in contrast to the fire alarm that went off during the July administration.  After the exam, I went out for celebratory drinks and dinner with some Berkeley friends who live/work in the area--what catharsis!

The following week, I used some of my frequent flyer miles to take a lovely trip to D.C.  I stayed with my old roommate Jess at her new apartment, crashing on my old couch.  It was splendid to see some of my dearest D.C. friends, many of whom were able to take off time from work to hang out with me!  Having spent several years in D.C., there was no pressure to see the quintessential D.C. sights--the point was to spend time with friends.  However, we did take advantage of the unseasonably warm weather to walk the Tidal Basin, visit the zoo, fly kites, see the Arboretum, and tour my favorite historical site, Mount Vernon.  It is always delightful to see old friends and pick right up from where we left off.

Since returning to California, I've been spending time with my family, catching up on a backlog of emails and blog subscriptions, and beginning some post-bar projects.  I've started using my Spanish software again, which was one of my New Year's Resolutions.  I've also been cooking more, reading for pleasure, and working on my embroidery.  In fact, yesterday was my dad's birthday, and I gave him this cross-stitched version of the famous Blue Marble photograph of the Earth from Apollo 17, because he loves rocketry and the space program:

Other post-bar endeavors include volunteering more, donating blood, using the yoga classes I bought on Groupon, and getting back into jogging.  I discovered a free iPhone app called C25K Free (Couch to 5k) that provides an eight-week schedule of audio-guided interval training, which has been very helpful in keeping me motivated.

I also plan to spend a significant amount of time helping my parents downsize and clear out the garage, as they are hoping to buy their first home this summer.  All of these things should keep me busy while waiting for bar results and employment!  Although, it's funny...  Just as I came to terms emotionally with the fact that I was still unemployed and taking the bar exam a second time, I got two interviews in a week.  Mysterious.  We'll see what happens, but for now, I'm trusting in God and trying to celebrate the time I have been given.

Deserting Desserts

Lent is my favorite liturgical season.  It is a very effective impetus for changing day-to-day habits in a way that brings me closer to God.  I've been pondering many different Lenten disciplines...  Over the past few years, I've given up meat, coffee, and even elevators, I've prayed the Rosary daily, I've read Scripture daily, I've fasted weekly, and I've tried focusing on a different virtue for each day of the week.  The past few years have been more abstract, but I think this Lent, I'd like to return to the classic Lenten practice abhorred by children everywhere: giving up desserts.

Alibi will help me by guarding the fridge.

Living on my own, desserts haven't been a major issue.  It's simple: if you don't buy them, then you don't eat them.  But, now that I'm living with my family, there is constant temptation!  Chocolates, ice cream, cakes, cookies, pastries...  There is always something sweet in our kitchen, and I have not been employing much self-control.  So, I will be using this Lent to reign in that lack of discipline, and focus instead on the sweetness of prayer.  What better dessert for a meal than prayer?  To complement giving up desserts, I plan on praying the Rosary each evening this Lent.

A couple of caveats on giving up desserts.  First, I will not be practicing this discipline on Sundays.  Traditionally, Sundays "don't count" as a part of Lent, because one does not fast when the bridegroom is present.  So, desserts are allowed on Sundays, but not to excess.  Second, birthday cake on a family member's birthday is allowed.  My dad and my brother both have birthdays during Lent this year, and I want to be able to celebrate with them.  But otherwise, no desserts!

I'll be using some discretion as to what counts as a dessert. Sweet breakfast foods are strangely ambiguous.  I think a good demarcation is icing/frosting.  So, no donuts, but some muffins; no filled croissants, but plain ones; no coffee cakes, but some breakfast breads...  Basically, if I would feel guilty about it, I won't eat it.

What are you giving up for Lent this year?

Daffodils

It's two weeks until the bar exam, and I'm feeling a lot more at peace with it than I was at this point over the summer.  I've been very focused on practice exams for the MBE (the multiple choice section), which was where I fell short in July.  I have plenty more studying to do before the real deal, but I think my attitude is making a difference this time around.  I've been letting myself take breaks, setting realistic study schedules, and don't have to deal with the fear of the unknown (since I've taken it before).

My dear Georgetown Law friend Maya sent me a wonderful book of Daily Reflections for Bar Exam Study, which I've been reading each morning.  It has contained a lot of helpful reminders, including that the exam is not a measure of me as a person, that worrying is not productive, that it's okay to take breaks, and that I have many blessings in my life.  It's been nice to set the tone for my day with those reflections, and I will definitely be passing this book along to friends taking the exam in future years.

I haven't blogged about dating before, but with Valentine's Day around the corner, I wanted to share that I've been trying out online dating.  For a while, I've had negative views of online dating.  I felt like meeting someone online would be akin to giving up on "real" dating.  But, after watching several friends try out OkCupid and other sites, I began to realize that online dating doesn't mean you aren't still meeting people through more traditional channels.  Rather, it gives you the opportunity to meet people you might not otherwise encounter--and, that's good!

So, I set up a profile, answered a ton of questions about myself, and started receiving (and sending) messages!  So far, I've been on a couple dates with one guy who was very sweet, intelligent, and entertaining, but I didn't feel a romantic attraction, so we decided to just be friends.  I've been messaging some other interesting guys, and am excited to go on more dates.  Now that I'm back in the Bay Area, I finally feel like I don't have school or an impending cross-country move to stop me from pursuing a long-term relationship.  We'll see what happens!

Speaking of being back in California, I am really enjoying our spring weather in February.  This morning, I spotted some wild daffodils growing in our side yard, so I dug up the bulbs and potted them.  The yellow flowers add a refreshing splash of color to my desk!  Here's Alibi, being a good kitten who doesn't dig up plants (we'll see how long that lasts...):

For My Money

Being unemployed, it is a fun little form of escapism to think about how I want to spend money when I have some.  I'm not all that wrapped up in consumerism, but I do have some desires.  Here are a few big-ticket items on my wish list, in no particular order:

• A car.  As I was just discussing with Shauna, as long as I remain in suburbia, I think this has to be my next big purchase.  It doesn't have to be big, or fast, or even all that pretty.  Decent fuel efficiency would be nice.  It cannot be red.
• A DSLR.  I have a lot of fun with my little Canon PowerShot SD1300IS, and even with my iPhone in a pinch, but I know my photography will never reach its full potential until I have a better camera.
• A KitchenAid stand mixer.  My mom has one, and it makes baking magical.  Perhaps some day she'll upgrade to the larger model, and I will inherit her old cobalt blue one?  If not, majestic yellow and boysenberry are happy colors.
• A kitty condo.  The kittens quickly outgrew their 2-foot tall scratching post/hammock.  I cannot wait to have the room for a 6-foot tall tower for them to climb (hopefully in lieu of my bookcases).
• An iMac and an iPad.  These will be my next major technology purchases.  I think I'd like to transition from a laptop to a desktop computer, because the big screen is so fantastic, and I don't need to lug a laptop all over the place now that I'm done with school.  Plus, by supplementing it with an iPad, I would still have the option of mobility for basic computing needs.

Actually, now that I look at this list, I realize that I forgot to mention travel.  Perhaps I'll do a different post about the places I want to visit.  In addition, here are some smaller splurges that I would enjoy on occasion:

• Things I don't need from Etsy.  Oh, there are so many things.  Stationery, art, decorations, jewelry, cat collars, bags...
• Cultural enrichment.  I miss D.C.'s free museums and $10 tickets to the National Symphony Orchestra a lot.  Alas, the San Francisco Symphony is far more expensive.  I'd also like to attend more plays, musicals, and museums.
• Random ingredients.  I would love to have a fully stocked pantry of obscure spices.  There are dozens of new recipes that I want to try.
• Throwing dinner parties.  I really enjoy having friends over for a home-cooked meal, some good wine, and hilarious conversations.
• Books for my Kindle.  There is so much reading that I want to do.

I also like to think about where my charitable contributions will go when I have an income.  My heart always sinks when I am not able to give very much to:

• The Paulist Fathers.  Newman Hall at Berkeley was a place of profound formation for me as a Catholic.  I would love to do more to support their ministries.
• The Leadership Award.  I received this scholarship from the Cal Alumni Association three times, and it was a huge help.  I have donated time by grading application essays and interviewing applicants, but I want to help out financially as well.
• The Alzheimer's Association.  My grandmother passed away last year after suffering from Alzheimer's for years.  I intend to fight this disease by supporting the research and programs of the Alzheimer's Association.
• The Equal Justice Foundation.  EJF funded all of my summer internships while at Georgetown Law.  I want to support the next generation of public interest law students.
• All of the non-profits where I've worked/volunteered.  It will be great to give back to HomeBase, the Washington Legal Clinic for the Homeless, the Law Foundation of Silicon Valley, and the Center for Gender & Refugee Studies.

What is on your wish list?  Which charities do you like to support?

SOPA

Hey, who turned out the lights?

Bible in a Year

I have one more resolution to add to my list: read the Bible and the Catechism in one year.  Despite working on my prayer life and finding fellowship, the reality is that scripture was somewhat absent from my life last year.  Plus, 2012 is a leap year, so that gives me plenty of extra time, right?

I started poking around for schedules for reading the entire Bible over the course of a year.  Being Catholic (and, okay, perhaps a bit of an overachiever), I wanted a schedule that included the Deuterocanonical books.  Google led me to this guide published by the Coming Home Network, which also includes a schedule to read the entire Catechism in a year!  It had not occurred to me to include the Catechism, but I love the idea.  So, I will be reading the entire Bible and Catechism this year.  Who's with me?!*

In a similar vein of long-term objectives, I will also mention that I've started a new journaling project: the One Line a Day five-year memory book.  The concept is simple: everyone has time to jot down one or two sentences of reflection about their day, no excuses.  Each page is devoted to a single day, with space for five years' worth of reflections.  So, as you continue to use the journal year after year, you get to compare what you were thinking on the same day in previous years.  I heard about the journal from Monica, and I am enjoying it so far!

* Alternately, if you don't have time to read the Bible in a year, perhaps you at least have time for Bible in a Minute?

EDIT: I modified the CHN guide to include the dates for 2012, available here.